Friends, part 1

Hi buddy,

I need friends. I think everybody does, it's just a normal extension of family, which is a sign that we are social creatures. I used to (and sometimes still do) label myself as a 'einzelganger', the Dutch/German term for someone who rather does things on their one, kind of like a hermit, but I'm starting to pull that self adorned label into question. Maybe it is because I've now been too long on myself, writing in my little townhouse with only city strangers around me. My wife is off to work every day and my son to school and where does that leave me? No colleagues (haven't had them for years now as I'm a freelancer webdesigner). No friends (because of my lifestyle I hardly go out and socialize with others and most people I know are colleagues of Nancy).

I am writing about Simon who is looking for his kidnapped sister Sally. Their parents are out of the picture and because of the nature of the story I'm writing Simon has to venture into strange and faraway places, separated from everything familiar. This includes his friends. So no family, no friends. When I read it as such, it almost reads like my own story. My mother passed away in 2007 after a long battle with failing lungs and my father lives remarried in Canada after a separation with my mother when I was 7. My brother and sister live in two separate countries and I haven't spoken to them for a long while and when I moved away from Holland in 2002 to volunteer in Africa I left them and all my friends behind. After all: my new wife Nancy (and later son Alex) was my new family.

But somehow along the way, just like Simon, we all need a fresh injection of friendship. That special relationship with someone with whom you share similar traits. In my case that could be a movie buddy, fellow young adult novel reader or IT guy/gal. Simon finds his friends in the unlikely shapes of Alix and Maya. They have an invested interest in Simon and helping him find Sally and will turn into close friends on this crazy and fantastical journey he'll end up making. However. they are not human (and I'll leave it at that for now) and that will isolate Simon even more and make him feel he truly is alone in the world.

The concept of emotional and social isolation is not a new one in fiction. In fact it's a very popular one. Just look at Harry Potter being isolated in his role as 'the boy that lived', Artemis Fowl alone in his knowledge of the faerie kingdom and a criminal genius to boot. The Baudelaire siblings in Series of Unfortunate Events, even more isolated as friends and family they meet, end up dead. All the current modern young adult fiction revolves around kids without functioning family units (parents usually missing, dead or otherwise inconvenienced) having to deal with a situation only they understand. What to make of this angst, this odysee into the psyche of a person (young or old - hence the broad reader appeal) that wonders if they fit in the big bad world around them?

I struggle with it as well now, as no doubt everyone does at one point in their lives, and wonder about this fragile thing, the human connection...

to be continued....